New Jersey Scientist Discovers Life on Mars

PASSAIC, N.J., Dec. 5, 2008 - Earlier this week, while cruising through his extensive catalogue of TiVoed-but-yet-to-be-watched programs, Passaic, N.J., physiologist Eugene Melowictz discovered ABC’s television series Life on Mars. After watching the first episode of the sci-fi/crime drama, which originally aired Oct. 9, Melowictz was reportedly hooked.

“It’s really, really good. Kind of weird, but really good,” Melowictz told a coworker the day after his discovery. “And Harvey Keitel is awesome. I'll probably be able to watch the rest of the episodes in the next few days here and be caught up by the weekend.”

Most of Melowictz's colleagues expressed tempered excitement about his discovery as well as concern that he may be a very sad, very lonely man.